Last night I saw the film “Constantine”, starring Keanu Reeves as John Constantine, a renegade Demon destroyer, and the lovely Rachel Weisz as Angela Dodson, the damsel in distress who is also a police officer investigating her twin sister’s suicide.
I’m not sure why I had the urge to see the film, because normally I’m not down with devil movies, but like I said, the film stars Rachel Weisz.
These movie guys sure are smart. They’re sitting around one day and they suddenly realise the have no real story. Oh, no. What to do?
One producer says to the other producer: “We got Rachel Weiss, so now all we need is some water and we have our demographic audience.” Cue Keanu, who explains that water is a natural conduit between this world and the demon world.
So yes, there’s a bathtub scene, along with a few other water scenes that make you feel much better about spending your hard earned ISK 800 on the ticket.
Despite the film’s flaws, I loved it. Because during the film I had what one might call an epiphany. In the film, those that can spot demons can sense their arrival because demons carry a strong stench of sulphur. And when Keanu travels to hell – twice – it’s really, really windy, the ground is scarred, it’s dreary, and there’s lots and lots of fire.
Sound like a certain island in the north Atlantic?
Thankfully I don’t have the power to spot demons. I do, however, smell that sulphur every morning when I take a shower. Also, when I wash my dishes in hot water, there it is again, that demon smell.
And about WIND. I believe Bart has lost his marbles writing about spring when it’s only March, because while it was sunny the past two days, it was windy, windy, windy. And cold. And today the grey has returned. Spring, I think not. But we got plenty of wind.
If “Constantine” makes oodles of money and the filmmakers want to make a sequel, they could forgo the expensive CGI special effects, and shoot in Iceland. We have plenty of hell up here to go around. In fact, Mt. Askja, and the crater Víti, (northern highlands) is the perfect place to recreate the netherworld because during the Middle Ages it was thought to be the entrance into hell.
Just make sure to bring Ms. Weisz. EW